Christmas on TV: Gems You May Have Missed

Lucky Christmas

This movie premiered last year on the Hallmark Channel, but because I only had about two weeks of TV Christmas movie viewing time on my hands, I had to pick and choose, and I ended up deleting a lot of them without even watching them on fast forward. Missing this one was a mistake! It has a fairly original idea of getting the happy couple together, although it does remind me of that '90s flick with Nicolas Cage and Bridget Fonda, It Could Happen to You.

Elizabeth Berkley from Saved by the Bell plays a single mom who aspires to be a chef but is stuck in hostessing and convenience store jobs. Every week, she buys a lottery ticket with the same numbers, kisses it for good luck, and of course the one time she wins is the time she left the ticket in the glove box of her stolen car.

The thief of her car just happens to be the quirky but barely-ever-on-screen friend of Jason Gray-Stanford. You probably know him as Lieutenant Randy Disher from Monk, but in this movie he plays a construction worker and aspiring architect who is channelling Bill Pullman in While You Were Sleeping. His family business is about to go under, and he lets his quirky friend convince him that he deserves a reward for finding the ticket. He starts spending time with Elizabeth Berkley and her son who plays one of the best kids I've ever seen in a movie of this type. There's hockey, there's baking, there's a pinewood derby--and I found myself smiling in spite of myself. The ending is a bit abrupt, but I was cheering the entire movie for this odd couple that actually makes a lot of sense. Watch it.

Trading Christmas
Some viewers might consider this a made-for-TV twist on The Holiday, and I'll admit that there's more than a little similarity between the movies, at least in basic premise. Two singles swap homes during the holiday season and find love and friendship in their new but temporary abodes. But I honestly prefer Trading Christmas (even though it lacks Jude Law). While the basic setup requires a willing suspension of disbelief, as does the notion that both principal parties to the house swap would find love that quickly while only meeting one new person each, the acting and the situations in this movie seem natural rather than forced. These couples don't need coy kisses under the mistletoe; they just need good conversation and undeniable chemistry.

Trading Christmas also differs from The Holiday in that our house swappers are not running away from recent break-ups or unrequited love. Faith Ford's character is a widow who already lives a full and happy life but makes room for more love and adventure when she meets bachelor businessman Gil Bellows. His brother, Tom Cavanaugh, is a novelist suffering from writer's block and a not-quite-healed broken heart from a broken engagement, and the last thing he wants (but the first thing he needs) is the influence of recent divorcee Gabrielle Miller on his writing. None of these four actors plays their part with an overabundance of heartbreak, which endears them all the more to the audience and makes you giddy and cheerful as their relationships blossom. I loved this one last year; I loved it again this year. Seldom does a made-for-TV Christmas movie stand the multiple viewing test like this one.

Recipe for a Perfect Christmas
By endorsing this movie on the "Gems" list, I don't want you to get the idea that this is a classic. But I remembered liking it enough last year to watch it again this year. What I'd forgotten between now and then is the outspokenness of the mom (played by Christine Baranski) and the selfishness of the daughter that grated on me throughout the movie but also seemed believable. I really do know women who open their mouths and spew out whatever opinions they have, no matter how blunt, and those women's daughters are usually just as outspoken in their own selfish ways.

Once I got past the overtly annoying traits of feuding daughter and overbearing mother, I discovered that Christine Baranski plays a more multi-layered mom than I've ever seen in a Christmas movie, made-for-TV or otherwise. Within moments she shifts from strong, independent job seeker to subtly insulted rejectee striving to maintain dignity. I root for her character most in this movie, since her side of the story seems more sympathetic than her shortsighted and overprivileged daughter's. However, I did root for the daughter to overcome that shortsightedness and realize she should be with the sexy Italian chef she asked to take her mom out. Because he's a sexy Italian chef. Who doesn't love that?

Christmas in Boston
Technically, I already reviewed this movie last year as a Not-Too-Shabby, but since then I have discovered that one of its stars is Patrick J. Adams of Suits. Because of my huge crush on his Suits character, Mike Ross, I watched Christmas in Boston with a whole new kind of appreciation. If you like Suits, you probably will, too. Catch it during ABC Family's 25 Days of Christmas or whenever you want on YouTube if you're not picky about image quality.

Christmas on TV: This should be a movie...

You may have seen this already. But even if you have, you should watch it again.

Are you like me, wishing this actually were a movie? If you read my blog, I'm betting you do.

I think the first commenter below the video says it best:

I was so freaking excited for this movie. I thought "OMG there's hope for me."
And then BAM
freaking. sears. commercial.

But, aside from the female lead's over-abbreviated vocabulary, this should be a movie. His name is Eddie. Which is a hot name, if you remember what I mean. And maybe minus the cheesy saying, "Those who wish to sing always find a song."

And yet, there's some truth to that saying. At least there is if you spin it to say, "Those who wish to write Christmas movies for television always come up with new plots." Here are a few I brainstormed this morning (some with my mother's help), hereby copyrighted for future production by me.

Christmas in the E.R.: A mockumentary about "the most dangerous day of the year" and the doctors and nurses who work it. First, Siamese twin brothers break their shared leg trying to use their new sled. Then, a grandma gets run over by her son's minivan, decked out like a reindeer for the holiday season. Later, a boy shoots his eye out after receiving a Red Ryder BB gun. And so the holiday goes. Prepare yourself for the most painful Christmas movie since Home Alone 2.

Watch out, Grandma!

The Christmas Sweater: An ugly but lucky Christmas sweater grants the wishes of its five different wearers: a single mom attending her office holiday party, a heartless executive forced to spend Christmas at home, a poor but deserving bride-to-be planning her nuptials for New Year's Eve, a nerdy and kindhearted mail carrier who always spends Christmas Eve alone, and an Australian web designer enjoying his first Christmas in wintertime. Possibly starring Matt Damon.

I'm Matt Damon, and I approve this movie.

Ice, Ice Baby: A standoffish graphic designer, best known in her field for her innovative wrapping paper patterns, meets a professional hockey player while volunteering at a mall gift wrapping station. Sparks fly as she teaches him to wrap elegantly and he teaches her to skate swiftly, but when his hockey schedule interferes with their budding romance, will she view his smooth moves as thin ice for a relationship or allow him to score a hat-trick with her heart? (Alternative title: Wrap Up My Heart)

We're a real couple, and we're adorable.

And these are our real engagement photos.

Hot Cocoa: A hot chocolate company holds a contest to find the nation's best homemade hot cocoa, and two of the company's top executives (who happen to hate each other) travel to meet the finalists and select a winner. Soon, the heat between them originates in more than the steamy liquids they drink, and their once frozen hearts are beginning to warm to the idea of romance again. 

A cupful of hot, strong love

Christmas on TV: Will You Merry Me?

As the promotional poster makes clear, Will You Merry Me? focuses more on the feuding mothers-in-law to be than their engaged children. Lifetime clearly intended to appeal to their typical audience of women over 40 by validating the emotions of women facing the imminent marriage of their children rather than the romantic emotions of those marrying children.

In theory, this underrepresented segment of the Christmas movie population should create some refreshing new protagonists for the genre. In reality, the movie plays as a Christmas spinoff of Bride Wars. A bad movie cannot a good knockoff inspire.

Aside from the mean matriarchs, the central couple opens the movie by getting engaged, an act meant to convince the audience that they are in love, but as the movie goes on and it becomes clear that they have never discussed their goals, their futures, or even their political beliefs, their "love" becomes less believable and their feuding more inevitable.

Indeed, feuding is the central element of the movie. Christmas vs. Hannukah. Career woman vs. housewife. City-dweller vs. suburbanite. Lawyer vs. artist. Unbelievable vs. Implausible. This movie's major flaws stem from the fact that it believes conflict must come from polar opposites that are clearly imposed by a writer instead of natural conflict stemming from character choices.

Plus, there's that nasty pun in the title. Will I "merry" you? No. Christmas is merrier without this movie.

Christmas on TV: Naughty or Nice (2012)

Hallmark Channel Christmas Movie 2012 #6

Going into this movie, my deepest fear was that Hilarie Burton's character would be the daughter, granddaughter, or other type of relative of Santa Claus. I think we can all agree that that angle on a made-for-TV Christmas movie has been done and done again, mostly in ways it shouldn't have been done. Luckily, Burton plays only a woman with the unfortunate name of Krissy Kringle (apparently given to her by the parents from Family Ties who reunite for five minutes of screen time) and is in no way related to the other Kris Kringle.

As the movie opens, Krissy Kringle's life is imploding: she loses her job, is getting nasty looks from her neighbors on Candy Cane Lane for not decorating her house for Christmas, and can't figure out why her boyfriend of six years hasn't proposed. (But what I can't figure out is why her boyfriend, played by Matt Dallas of Kyle XY, chooses to dress like Mr. Rogers when he's a lawyer and could easily dress like a cast member of Suits.) Because of her name and address, she receives a plethora of letters to Santa, along with a magical book that reveals the Naughty or Nice deeds of everyone she wants dirt on.

I felt that this movie cleverly included fantasy elements without being too over-the-top or annoying, although it could have done without the Santa Claus scene at the end. Much of the credit goes to the actors who really do provide the kind of performances that can transform a so-so script into a highly watchable film. Hilarie Burton in particular carried her role with grace, seldom overacting or giving a melodramatic performance that can turn an audience against a main character.

The best part of this movie? The sidekick elf who became Hilarie's best friend in the movie. He gave her great advice, he supported her at her street's dumb holiday party, he turned her dead-end job into a laugh a minute, he wore an elf suit in solidarity with her, he encouraged her to fight for her old job and stand up for herself with her boyfriend...and the list goes on and on. I mean, he was the kind of friend you tell your strangest secrets to, like "I somehow have Santa's Naughty and Nice list and it's telling me the best and worst deeds of everyone I know"--and he'll believe you without being a bit flabbergasted, and even if you've only known him for a few days. You can't buy friends like that. He was easily the most watchable part of the movie, but he got absolutely no reward for being charming. We didn't get to see him find a new romance, reunite with a long lost family member, or even get the gift he'd always wanted. He didn't even get a new job. In my opinion, he deserved a happy ending even more than Krissy Kringle did. Hallmark Channel, this guy should have a movie!

Christmas on TV: Speed-Watchers, Part 2

The Heart of Christmas (also available on Netflix)
I would categorize this movie as A Christmas Movie That Isn't about Christmas. Because it's actually a movie about a kid with cancer. I won't say it's the most sentimental kid-dying-of-cancer movie I've ever seen, and it is definitely family friendly. It's just not my cup of tea as far as Christmas on TV.

There's a frame story about Candace Cameron Bure and her husband, played by Burgess Jenkins, the racist player from Remember the Titans and a man who always looks to me like he's a contestant on The Bachelorette. She spends the entire movie reading the blog of dying child's mother, which is how the audience also learns about the true heart of the movie. Also watch out for George Newbern, the son-in-law from Father of the Bride, who plays one of the doctors. I don't have much else to say about this one, mostly because I hate to say anything against it since it is based on a real family's story. Usually, I'm adamant about dying kids being a ploy to make the audience cry, but I hope it never comes across that I don't realize that some families actually do have children who die. 

A Christmas Proposal

The written synopsis of this one on TiVo gave me great expectations: "Two opposing lawyers--one-time sweethearts--battle over the development of a ski resort." If romantic Christmas movies have one purpose, it's to reunite former lovers who are now feuding, or at least unite enemies who are destined to be spouses. The male lawyer brings his privileged new girlfriend to his hometown where his down-to-earth former girlfriend (played by Charles in Charge and Baywatch alum Nicole Eggert) still lives. Tom Arnold makes an appearance as the stuck-up girlfriend's father, in case you haven't seen enough of him this season (and there's more to come!). A hour and 20 minutes in, I got my first visible clue that our feuding lawyers were actually falling back in love. And 20 minutes later, his soon-to-be-ex girlfriend gives him the worst movie slap ever. Take this one or leave it; your choice. Final piece of advice: do not propose with a high school class ring.

Christmas Every Day

I had exactly one reason for DVR'ing this movie: Erik von Detten. While EVD was never as popular as JTT, he did have quite the career as a '90s child star, providing the voice of Sid in Toy Story and starring in one of the greatest Disney Channel Original Movies, Brink! But EVD, like many child stars, also has plenty of projects on his early resume that would be better left inside some movie vault. Christmas Every Day is certainly one of those projects. A knockoff of the Bill Murray classic Groundhog Day, this movie instead allows an ungrateful teenage boy to relive Christmas four to seven times (I could have counted, but I really didn't care) until he realizes its true meaning. Aside from the ingrained flaws in that premise, this movie also features a town where somehow every store and restaurant is open on Christmas Day because EVD has time to rent a video and go on a date at the local hangout. If you're looking for a Christmas re-imagining of Groundhog Day, try ABC Family's 12 Dates of Christmas: at least Mark-Paul Gosselaar has outgrown his '90s child star look and become a man in it.

A Very Brady Christmas

This movie special from 1988 attempts (and sort of achieves) the impossible: fitting nine plot lines into a two hour movie. Yes, that's right, every member of the Brady clan gets his or her own story for this movie. Some I cared about more than others, so I found myself fast-forwarding through the "lesser" Bradys. But I'll summarize for you.

Mike: He must deal with an disagreeable client who doesn't like the structural changes to the architectural design.

Carol: She has no idea that Mike is planning to buy her a trip to Japan for Christmas, so naturally she's planning on using the same funds to buy him a cruise around Greece.

Greg: He and his wife argue about which set of in-laws should be blessed with their presence for Christmas.

Marcia: Her husband lost his job at a toy factory, acts like a child, and refuses to let any of the other Bradys know about their situation. Also, Marcia owns a strange precursor to a flip phone that has a cord attached to it and what looks like a panda face on it.

Peter: He's in love with a woman at his office who's also his boss and wonders if he can marry her even though she makes more money. While discussing this dilemma with Bobby, I was forced to ask myself if I ever thought of Peter as the kind of kid who would grow up to wear striped nightgowns. The answer was no.

Jan: She and her husband, Phillip, are having marital problems but keeping them secret from the family.

Bobby: He's dropped out of college and wants to become a race car driver.

Cindy: She wanted to go skiing with her girlfriends for Christmas instead of coming home. And since she's not the original Cindy, I wondered why they didn't just let her. I'm sure Cousin Oliver would have been available.

Alice: Sam the butcher cheated on her with a younger woman, so she's moved back in with Mike and Carol and volunteered to be their slave. Not really, but kind of, since she starts wearing her uniform again like she's a servant rather than a friend.

One final observation: A Very Brady Christmas aired on the last day of ABC Family's Countdown to the 25 Days of Christmas, indicating that it cannot on its own merits earn a spot in the actual 25 Days of Christmas. Which is sadly accurate.