But the real reason for making this confession is because this week's episode, "Blame It On the Alcohol," reminded me of two very strange assemblies I had in high school, memories I had repressed until the musical stylings of Ke-dollar sign-ha brought them to the surface.
Strange assembly number one: I am from Idaho. Idaho is the birthplace of Napoleon Dynamite. Idaho is the home to 98 percent of the cast of Napoleon Dynamite. Including the bully from the movie, who imdb.com assures me is named Bracken Johnson. He spoke to my school about how not to be a bully, which I think implies that he actually is one because this sounds like some sort of state-mandated community service. And, in case you are jealous that you, too, didn't get the opportunity to learn to be a "V. N. P." (a very nice person, not a very Napoleon person), here's a photo of him giving one of these assemblies. No, tots were not provided.
Strange assembly number two: For some reason, the administration decided not to take the route taken on Glee and instead of having the choir sing about the dangers of alcohol, they hired a hypnotist for this part of our social education. He did all the basic hypnotist stuff, convincing students they'd won the lottery, that they were chickens, that hypnosis is actually real. But then came...THE DRAMATIC PART. He hypnotized these same students into thinking they'd just been in a drunk driving accident. Thus, the star of the rival football game and the school drama queen lost their "son" and went into hypnotic hysteria. Well, I haven't been drunk, or driven while drunk, and I think this angle worked just as well as having a cheerleader barf on a musical theater diva. Plus, no barf. Win-win.
And thanks to the wonders of the internet, Google images, and flickr, this is a picture of the actual hypnotist and my vice-principal in my actual high school gym. Yes, I love technology, but not as much as Blaine, you see. But I still love technology. Always and forever.
First of all, here's the topic for a blog of another day. The reason I enjoy Glee so much is it is now the reigning (drag)queen of great one liners, taking that title away from Loralei and Rory. For example: "Geronimo called. He wants his hair back." Each episode is jam-packed with them. Case-in-point. Ke-dollar-sign-ha. On paper it looks like this: Ke$ha.That is funny. Even funnier, though, is the face that Mr. Cairns not only looks hypnotized, but also hung over from too much al-al-al-al-co-hol. Which we know he doesn't do. But just for fun, in an imaginary world, I'll be the next photo would be of him. Barfing. All over the hypnotist. Just sayin'.
ReplyDelete***fact not face
ReplyDelete***bet not be
***it looks like I was also drinking and writing, which I was not.