Tuesday, March 22, 2011

When Happy Is Sad

I never cry in movies. Never. Often, I am deeply moved, intellectually stirred, or emotionally jarred. But my eyes refuse to spill their tears.

Except for tonight, when I went to perhaps the happiest movie in the theaters right now, Tangled. It's Disney; it's a princess; it's true love. What could be sad about that?

The true love part. Because after asking two guys out in two days and getting two "I'm busy"s, a girl's heart is only so far from the edge of breaking.

And her heart definitely can't take it when a girl who lived her whole life in a tower falls for the first guy she EVER meets and captures his heart, too. All in two days.

And her heart doesn't like it when those same two share a perfect gondola ride with magic lanterns everywhere. That's when she starts to cry. At the happy parts. Because they seem so foreign, ethereal, unobtainable, distant, mocking. And sad.

Monday, March 7, 2011

What Part of 'Bacon' Don't You Understand?

For all you bacon lovers out there, here's a strange list of bacon products. If you know anything about Even Stevens, you'll understand why this is perfect for Bernard "Beans" Arengaren. And if you know anything about the Kevin Bacon game, you'll understand the not very related list that follows.

Shia LaBeouf starrred in Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull with...
Karen Allen, who starred in The Sandlot with...
Denis Leary (who looks a bit like Kevin Bacon).

Shia LaBeouf starred in The Greatest Game Ever Played directed by...
Bill Paxton, who was in Apollo 13 with...
Kevin Bacon, who is the reason for this game in the first place.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

My Kind of Cougars

The whole world is probably aware of the BYU basketball situation going on right now. And I don't want to add to the rhetoric surrounding the team and its recently suspended player. Because all four people who read my blog know where I stand on this one.

But I do want to make one observation. All the serious news sources commenting on BYU's actions protecting and defending the honor code are lauding the school for its integrity in a sporting becoming more and more about money and less and less about good sportsmanship. And all the self-inflated, comedic "news" sources can only focus on the nature of the transgression and the out-of-date-edness of BYU, the LDS church, and Mormons all around. I guess when your main goals is laughs and not respect, you'll do anything to get one, including throw away all semblance of moral values unless they line up with popular opinion.